I wondered whether to write about this, but eventually the need to throw it on to paper (or computer) was too strong. I hope I am not being too self-indulgent, but I console myself with the truth that nobody is forced to read it. You can all go away and ignore me - and quite right too.
It all started about six weeks ago. My right breast felt 'peculiar', and it was painful. I made the usual excuses. It took two weeks to summon up the courage to go to my GP. I always suspected I was a cowardly wimp (is that a tautology?) and now I know. I'll spare you the details - we all know the drill. Actually, I won't spare you the details, but I shall milk them for all they are worth and so they won't all get used today. I shall tell you about appointments and so forth on other occasions. Suffice it to say today that I now officially have cancer. What is less clear is what sort.
There was me, convinced I had an adenocarcinoma of the breast (look it up - I'm not turning into a textbook!) when lo and behold I was told it could be all manner of things. Biopsies and scans followed. And we are still not sure. It is probably breast, but we'll know for sure (I hope!) after surgery. And then they can advise about treatment plans. And then........
Do you know what is really crazy? My greatest worry in all this has been 'who is going to look after Molly Cat if I have to spend time in hospital'. Now that is sorted out, I am much calmer and just want to get the whole thing over with. Frankly, it hurts and is unpleasant and I just want it off. Crazy.
And I need to say how wonderful all my friends have been. The support is immense and so special. More of that later. Now I'm going to watch the Wimbledon highlights. I timed this wrong by one week. I should have had the operation last week; then I could have sat up in bed and watched all the tennis with a clear conscience. Typical!
For those of you who believe in God - please keep me in your prayers.
